Frequently Misheard Lyrics

[John Battles]

Maybe you've heard of , or seen , the book "'Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy" , about "Frequently" misheard lyrics , when maybe a half - dozen or so entries were ever heard that way by anyone other than the compilers , such as : 

"There's a bathroom on the right" ("There's a bad moon on the rise").

When I was in Junior High , "Miss You" was a big deal , even though I was about the only kid in my school who even liked The Stones.

"I've been haulin' ass along" -  ("I've Been Holdin' out so long") ("ASS" was still a big deal in the 70's).

 

The band , Le Roux, were briefly popular with "I'm Addicted".

"I 'm a dickhead , baby"   ( "I'm addicted , baby."). There's no way they did'nt plan it that way.

 

And , one could write a book on the Ramones (I already wrote an article...).

 

"They're formin' in a straight ine , they're goin' to the car wash."  ("They're formin' in a straight line , they're goin' thru a tight line." )   ("Blitzkrieg Bop.").

 

"Shot in Vietnam , I'm doin' fine"   ("Shock treatment , I'm doing fine.") ("Gimme Gimme Shock Treatment").

 

"I Can't Give You Anything" ("You think I'm kind of cute , but , who's gonna bring home the ludes ?" ("...But , who'e gonna bring home the loot ?")  .

 

"Hey , hey , hey , what is it on the TV ?" ("HEY , HEY , HEY , WHY IS IT ALWAYS THIS WAY ?". )    "Why Is It Always This Way?".

 

Then there's ....."Final Solution" , Pere Ubu . "Don't need a cure , and I don't need a cure , and I don't need a cure , I need a final solution."     ("Don't need a car , and I don't need a job , and I don't need a girl , I need a final solution"....That said it all , for me , when I first heard it in my teens. Even if I was wrong.).

 

Sex Pistols "New York" "An imitation made of Cheech and Chong."  ("..Cheese and chalk.")

                                  "You porno faggots"  ("You poor little faggots".).

 

X - "Universal Corner"  "Scream in agony" ( "Screaming "Magdalene").

 

"Nausea"    "Take this , this is all they had." ("Take the scissors , saw the head.").

 

"Johnny Hit and Run Pauline"  "He bought a sterilized light bulb"  ("Sterilized Hypo" - That was'nt mine , that was on a lyric sheet for a band I was auditioning with.).

 

You get the idea , let's see some of yours.

 

 

[ash]

is this the real life, is this just Battersea..?

[Mark George Harrison]

In Eddie Cochrans Drive in show theres a line which sounds like 'took my penis to the candy bar!'  its actually  'i'll bet my peanuts to a candy bar' which I just had to look up after 30 odd years of wondering! God bless t'internet!

[John Battles]

That's a classic ! I knew he was saying "Peanuts" , he HAD to be...but , it always sounded like "I'll bet my penis to a candy bar...". Good early example. Someone asked me which song did I think had the first F-Bomb. I was'nt sure , but , "Shave 'em Dry" (Early 30'S) is posilutely FILTHY.
 
Mark George Harrison said:

In Eddie Cochrans Drive in show theres a line which sounds like 'took my penis to the candy bar!'  its actually  'i'll bet my peanuts to a candy bar' which I just had to look up after 30 odd years of wondering! God bless t'internet!

[MikeL]

I have a good one.  Remember "Do You Love Me?" by the Contours?  The line that says, "I can mash potato," well, I seriously thought the singer sang "I'm a masturbator" when I first heard that song:)  I wondered to myself at the time, "How did they get away with releasing that song in 1962?"  I wonder if Johnny Thunders ever thought to sing it that way.

[MikeL]

LOL, that's even better than my misunderstood lyric:)

Mark George Harrison said:

In Eddie Cochrans Drive in show theres a line which sounds like 'took my penis to the candy bar!'  its actually  'i'll bet my peanuts to a candy bar' which I just had to look up after 30 odd years of wondering! God bless t'internet!

[John Battles]

That's hilarious. I think the closest Johnny got to that was on "Stations of The Cross" where he's doing yet another live version of "Do You Love Me" , dedicating it to HenryVIII.

 

Johnny: Yew broke mah HAHHT cuz ah cud'nt dance....SO AH FUCKIN' CUT YER HEAD OFF !!!.......Ah kin Mash POTATAH , AH KIN DO DA TWIST !

 

Walter : DO THE TWIST !

 

Johnny : Ah kin cut yuh head off ! Ah could fuck yo' bitch ! (??)

 

Walter : I could make you piss ! (BOTH) TELL MEEEEEE , TELL MEEEE .......
 
MikeL said:

I have a good one.  Remember "Do You Love Me?" by the Contours?  The line that says, "I can mash potato," well, I seriously thought the singer sang "I'm a masturbator" when I first heard that song:)  I wondered to myself at the time, "How did they get away with releasing that song in 1962?"  I wonder if Johnny Thunders ever thought to sing it that way.

[Axel]

A friend back in Germany thought for reasons unknown to me that Fred Cole sings in 'Walking On My Grave' 'there's a new kid on the block and he's drinking my blood'. He must have had beans in his ears(a famous German saying).

[John Battles]

Fred , God bless him , has got "Beans in his ears" , too , from playing loud music for so many years. What was the line "...And he's taking my place" ? I have'nt heard it in a while.

 

Then , there's your countrymen , The Dukes , with "I'm an Unskilled Worker" - "Every day , when I'm alone , I just become a lazy bone"....Oh , wait , that IS what he said.

 

Or , not exactly misheard , but , The Rattles with "Las Vegas"- "LA LA LA LA , AUS ! AUS ! LAS VEGAS !!"  ("From , From Las Vegas ?!") , and "HAVE A WHISKEY ! HAVE A SODA !"  (I THINK THEY MEANT "HAVE A WHISKEY SODA" OR "HAVE A WHISKEY AND SODA", but , maybe it did'nt break down that way , to them......For which , I'm grateful.
 
The Raw Cuts said:

A friend back in Germany thought for reasons unknown to me that Fred Cole sings in 'Walking On My Grave' 'there's a new kid on the block and he's drinking my blood'. He must have had beans in his ears(a famous German saying).

[Bibliodiscoteque]

My godson used to sing the Misfits' Attitude as "Attitude You got some MONKEY attitude" I never though to correct her and now the song has a new meaning. 

[John Battles]

You were right not to correct your Godchild , I think. Now it's got MONKEY meaning !

I TURNED INTO A MONKEY - OH , WHOA , OH !...... My friend had his little girl sing "Iron Man" for us , built it up like a big production , and she goes , "OZZY lost his mind....".
 
Bibliodiscoteque said:

My godson used to sing the Misfits' Attitude as "Attitude You got some MONKEY attitude" I never though to correct her and now the song has a new meaning. 

[Axel]

You heard that wrong, it's 'as' like in 'Las' not 'aus' ;-)

Soda in Germany is often used when someone wants sodawater. Just one of many mistakes zee Germans do when speaking Änglisch.

Or , not exactly misheard , but , The Rattles with "Las Vegas"- "LA LA LA LA , AUS ! AUS ! LAS VEGAS !!"  ("From , From Las Vegas ?!") , and "HAVE A WHISKEY ! HAVE A SODA !"  (I THINK THEY MEANT "HAVE A WHISKEY SODA" OR "HAVE A WHISKEY AND SODA", but , maybe it did'nt break down that way , to them......For which , I'm grateful.
 

[Axel]

But what I really wanna know is...what is he singing? The mighty Hurriganes!!!