1.) When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". What good is cake if you can't eat it?
2.) When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it?
3.) People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
4.) When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
5.) When people say "life is short". Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does! What can you do that's longer?